paul from cleveland

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Posts by paul from cleveland

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  46

  How long before you stopped believing armageddon was on your doorstep?

  by bubba flavel in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i was born into "the truth" back in 1964. i made the big mistake of getting baptised when i was about 14 or so, purely to please my father as i saw how proud he was when my brothers were baptised....didn't work.. we moved to a new congregation when i was about 8, he introduced all my brothers to the congregation by name, a short bio of thier endearing qualities and how proud he was of them, when he introduced me it was "and this is our black sheep of the family, steve".. i remember living in fear at the fast approaching 1975....actually, living in terror is probably a more apt desciption.

  all of you will full well know how it was instilled into us at every meeting and assembly how we are living in the last days.. as a 15 year old, a brother dobbed me in for kissing a worldly girl at school.

  went through the marked process, judicial committy, disfellowshipped and the shunning which continues to this day by what's left of my family.

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  paul from cleveland

  I'm still anxious that armageddon might be on my doorstep but I don't want to serve God out of fear. However, then I think, if the last days are really to be like the days of Noah, I'm supposed to be afraid. I always have a knot in my stomach about it.
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  9

  Some Reflections (The Counting My Blessings Thread)

  by AllTimeJeff in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  thanks for reading this if you care.

  i really don't have a particular reason to write this other then the mood hit.

  it is likely to be rambling, and if it somehow makes some sense, i would consider that a bonus.. my life has distinct seasons.

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  paul from cleveland

  Thanks again for sharing Jeff. I always enjoy reading your posts too. I looked up Yaounde Cameroon on Google images. I try to imagine you there.
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  27

  Did you suffer from panic attacks in the borg?

  by highdose in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i can certainly say that i did and that i knew alot of others that did too.

  i can also say that i don't any more, i left my panic attacks in the km!.

  what about you?.

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  paul from cleveland

  Same here... only I would describe my experience as a "panic attack in slow motion".

  I'll wake up in the middle of the night... usually around 2:00 or 3:00 AM and will just lay there, unable to sleep, with incredible fear for several hours.

  Elsewhere, that is what I experience too. I keep a bottle of sleeping pills and a glass of water by my bed because of this. When I wake up in the middle of the night terrified and drenched in 'cold sweat', I change my t-shirt, move to a dry part of the bed, take another pill, and go back to sleep.

  Even during the day, I carry a sense of 'impending doom' and terror with me always. Work distracts from it. At night, though, is when it really all comes out. I know it sounds stupid, but, sometimes I have friends or even my dad sleep over because I'm 'scared'. I'm sort of in a constant state of panic. I think, for me, it's because I'm not sure about whether or not I'm making a mistake regarding the Witnesses.
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  14

  Mouthy

  by crapola in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm wondering how our friend mouthy is doing.

  i've probably just missed her posts lately but i have'nt seen her around.

  anyone keep in touch with her?.

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  paul from cleveland

  I love you Mouthy.
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  7

  E=MxCxC

  by frankiespeakin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fufxj1qszgk.

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  paul from cleveland

  thanks
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  27

  Did you suffer from panic attacks in the borg?

  by highdose in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i can certainly say that i did and that i knew alot of others that did too.

  i can also say that i don't any more, i left my panic attacks in the km!.

  what about you?.

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  paul from cleveland

  No, but I have them now.
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  69

  Jehovah's Witnesses and Calvinistic Predestination

  by AllTimeJeff in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is a complex question, and i just want to get a discussion started on the message of jehovah's witnesses and how it relates to their adventist roots, and esp calvinism.. bear with me, i will try to be concise.. we all know that while jehovah's witnesses like to deny adventist roots, that it is clear that according to them, the man jesus selected to get the whole thing started, c t russell, was heavily influenced by adventist ideas, esp the (adventist) idea that has really never left them; the idea that somehow, a time date or period can be inferred from the bible if you read certain scriptures through an adventist lens.

  (thus, the 2520 years, 7 gentile times, etc.).

  so while this is relatively well known, there is a concept that jehovah's witnesses teach against, yet practice.

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  paul from cleveland

  Thanks for another great topic. It's amazing to see how these ideas don't just come out of thin air. They all have roots somewhere. I would have never thought that learning about Calvinism would answer this vague, unformed question I've carried with me for so long.
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  69

  Jehovah's Witnesses and Calvinistic Predestination

  by AllTimeJeff in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is a complex question, and i just want to get a discussion started on the message of jehovah's witnesses and how it relates to their adventist roots, and esp calvinism.. bear with me, i will try to be concise.. we all know that while jehovah's witnesses like to deny adventist roots, that it is clear that according to them, the man jesus selected to get the whole thing started, c t russell, was heavily influenced by adventist ideas, esp the (adventist) idea that has really never left them; the idea that somehow, a time date or period can be inferred from the bible if you read certain scriptures through an adventist lens.

  (thus, the 2520 years, 7 gentile times, etc.).

  so while this is relatively well known, there is a concept that jehovah's witnesses teach against, yet practice.

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  paul from cleveland

  This is the issue I was trying to get at when I posted Is this our fate?
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  69

  Jehovah's Witnesses and Calvinistic Predestination

  by AllTimeJeff in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is a complex question, and i just want to get a discussion started on the message of jehovah's witnesses and how it relates to their adventist roots, and esp calvinism.. bear with me, i will try to be concise.. we all know that while jehovah's witnesses like to deny adventist roots, that it is clear that according to them, the man jesus selected to get the whole thing started, c t russell, was heavily influenced by adventist ideas, esp the (adventist) idea that has really never left them; the idea that somehow, a time date or period can be inferred from the bible if you read certain scriptures through an adventist lens.

  (thus, the 2520 years, 7 gentile times, etc.).

  so while this is relatively well known, there is a concept that jehovah's witnesses teach against, yet practice.

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  paul from cleveland

  I had never realized that the questions I had were based on Calvinist ideas that were carried over to the Witnesses. It makes so much sense the way you've explained it. That's always been one of my biggest issues but I've never been able to verbalize it properly.
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  69

  Jehovah's Witnesses and Calvinistic Predestination

  by AllTimeJeff in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is a complex question, and i just want to get a discussion started on the message of jehovah's witnesses and how it relates to their adventist roots, and esp calvinism.. bear with me, i will try to be concise.. we all know that while jehovah's witnesses like to deny adventist roots, that it is clear that according to them, the man jesus selected to get the whole thing started, c t russell, was heavily influenced by adventist ideas, esp the (adventist) idea that has really never left them; the idea that somehow, a time date or period can be inferred from the bible if you read certain scriptures through an adventist lens.

  (thus, the 2520 years, 7 gentile times, etc.).

  so while this is relatively well known, there is a concept that jehovah's witnesses teach against, yet practice.

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  paul from cleveland

  This is the exact question I've had my entire life. I remember an elder telling me, while we were out in service one day, that we were looking for people with 'good hearts'. I asked 'what if someone doesn't have a good heart, but they want to have one?' (referring to myself) He just shrugged his shoulders indicating that he didn't know. I've never thought I had a good heart but was a Witness by "accident" because of birth. I was sure that Jehovah would eventually root me out. (which is what happened)